Editor-In-Chief Gabriel J. Farr,

I would describe myself as someone who cares deeply about their academic pursuits. I enjoy academic discussion and boast an academically satisfactory grade point average. I am only human, however, and I occasionally stray from these rigorous scruples. On occasion, when I feel that I have participated enough in my discussions, or I have finished an assignment, I will treat myself to a game of sudoku. I find it academically stimulating to ponder over these puzzles, and I would say I have become somewhat skilled.
Imagine my joy and delight to find that the Thursday, October 2nd, 2025, volume 125, number three edition of the Exponent has published a sudoku puzzle! I myself am an avid reader (outside of class time, of course) of this Platteville-based publication. I took a copy of the paper with me, and between classes, worked on finding the correct numbers in the puzzle.
Weeks, Gabriel. I spent WEEKS looking, scouring, over this puzzle, convinced I had missed something. I began waking up in cold sweats, convinced that 8 and 9 couldn’t possibly be locked in such a way on the bottom right and center cells. After many feverish hours, I finally cracked. I became resolute with myself that I had simply made a folly somewhere or did not have the necessary skills to solve the puzzle. I entered the digits into a sudoku solver.
Now, Editor Farr, can you tell me why AnySudokuSolver.com was unable to give me a definitive answer? It is because there was not, in fact, a definitive answer. Your puzzle was so poorly constructed that it was impossible to determine one correct answer.
You make a mockery of me and my passions, Gabriel. You have wasted weeks of my time. You and your rag-tag bunch of denizen writers even failed to include an answer key in the following week’s paper, and I now know why! You have forsaken the name of good journalism. You have BESMIRCHED the process of sudoku puzzles and I am beyond enraged.
I know where you live, Editor Farr. I know where you work and what you drive. You are predictable and recognizable. This is not a large campus, either. If you EVER again decide to make such an unholy prank, nay, an ABOMINATION like that sudoku puzzle, I will use every asset known to me. You have jeopardized my learning with this blunder and I will not forgive you.

Do not f**k with me.