Water: A Journey and Review

A true story of the adventurous, heroic Stan Stanminson

Butternut Squash graphic

Water, DHMO, H2O … These are a few names we give the essence needed for life. We need it to live and thrive, but not many individuals can describe the power that is contained within the liquid. It takes someone with a refined pallate to even begin to describe it. 

Not many hold the credentials or meet the expectations within the Water Enthusiasts Club to even take on the burden of looking at water in the fourth dimension. However, I meet those standards. 

I started the journey by taking on the most crucial aspects of water drinking: the source and vessel. The source had to be a common location where many gather to acquire the liquid. This was an obvious answer. 

I went out and located an Elkay LZS8WSSK EZH2O Bottle Filling Station with a Single ADA Cooler, Filtered, 8 GPH, Stainless Steel water fountain. The vessel was the hardest decision, for this impacts the experience. I weighed my options between Styrofoam, plastic, glass and ceramic. 

Many sleepless nights were spent making the decision. Eventually, I decided I would use a Pepsi Cola Restaurant Ice Blue Plastic Tumbler Cup 32 oz. From here, I was ready for the taste test. 

I readied my cup and made my way to the water fountain and filled it to the brim. I returned to my desk and put on “Liebestraume: Nocturne No. 3 In A-Flat Major” on repeat to set the tone. For true experience, I swirled the water around and was impressed with the uniformity of the liquid. 

For the quality test I held it up to the natural light of the sun to spot anything in the water, then realized the cup is almost an opaque blue and it was overcast that day. The time finally arrived, I took the sip and was brought to a world of refreshment and bliss. My extreme dehydration was gone. My head stopped hurting and everything felt calm. It was an experience, as stated before, no one can describe. 

While I was enjoying the water, I realized water not only tastes good but has many different uses in daily life! Water can be used to make noodles, flush a toilet, generate electricity, help plants grow, make pancakes (if you are weird and don’t use milk), have a water balloon fight and so much more! 

Water is also necessary for life. The human body is 60% water, the earth is 71% water and lettuce is 96% water. Without water, the entire planet would look like the movie “Mad Max,” and no one wants to be in the movie “Mad Max,” because no one likes Max when he is Mad! I wouldn’t know because I never saw the movie.

As I was approaching the end the idea of bottled water slipped into my mind. The trend of most water bottle companies is the more expensive the bottle, the higher the quality! (Is this a true statement? Probably not.) We have the higher end water like Voss, Balanced pH, Smartwater and so on. 

However, if Smartwater is so smart how did it get itself stuck in the bottle? 

On the lower end we have Dasani, actual chemicals in a bottle labeled water. Drink a Dasani that has been left in a hot car for more than ten minutes and you will be having kidney failure: It is unbearable to drink. Aquafina is the water most individuals drink when at an event such as a sports game or concert. It is not bad but not good either. It is the true constant in the bottled world. The taste changes depending on the time, location and reason for drinking it. There is not much to say about it, only that it is much better than Dasani. 

As all these thoughts were rushing through my head, I had my last sip of water and was ready to give a final verdict. Water is a great beverage choice for any occasion or meal unless it is Dasani water. There are more benefits than negatives when thinking about the usage of water. In the end I give water a 7.17 out of 14 on the pH scale.