The opinions expressed in this Letter to the Editor do not necessarily reflect the views of the executive board or the Exponent.
To the Exponent,
According to a recent Exponent article on the February 22 CPR “Sex in the Dark” event, one of the topics was “the need to normalize masturbation” because masturbation “is completely healthy if it does not interfere with daily life.”
If accurate, this is terrible advice to give to young men. Masturbation is frequently combined with viewing pornography, and countless men have an addiction to porn.
It offers them an unrealistic, unhealthy portrayal of sexuality, it can harm their relationships with women, and over time it can lead to sexual dysfunction. By the time men realize that it is interfering with their daily lives, they are already hooked and then must struggle to rid themselves of this habit.
Let me offer much different advice. You are capable of excellence. But excellence requires self-control over your appetites for food, drink and sex. The ancient Greeks called this virtue of self-control “sōphrosunē”—literally “soundness of mind.”
They would be baffled, and for good reason, that our culture recognizes the need for self-control over the desires for food and drink but thinks the only necessary constraint on sex is consent.
Although it is difficult to gain self-mastery, nothing excellent is easy. Start by avoiding pornography as you would any addictive and risky drug. Find better ways to deal with stress, boredom or loneliness. Once you acquire some level of self-mastery, you will experience much greater satisfaction and self-esteem than you get from the cheap pleasures of fake love.
Sincerly,
Shane Drefcinski (the other Dr. Dre), Professor of Philosophy