At the age of five

My ideas of love consisted of far away places

Pretty dresses

Beautiful princesses

Fancy dances

A true love’s kiss

At ten these ideas shifted

Watching my parents

I fantasized about dinners together

Holding hands in public

Sweet little gestures

Laughing with each other

Having traditions

At fifteen I was convinced

I had figured it out

My love would take care of me

It was us against the world

But love became harder

It left little marks

Reminders of his love

Kept in a cage

Like a little bird

But I lost my song

It ripped things from me

That I can never get back. 

At eighteen I broke free

Love came to me and offered me help

He promised to put me back together

And to never leave marks

But this love was sneaky

His marks were hidden

Convinced me I was hopeless

Filled in the holes that I could not fill 

With others and barely tried to hide

In the end this love left more damage

Broke me down time and time again

Rendered me unrecognizable

Even to myself